By Richard La Ruina - Pua Training.com, author of The Natural Art of Seduction
Here we present a nine-phase sequence which covers a male-female interaction from the initial meeting of two strangers to the consummation of the interaction in sexual intercourse.
The sequence may occur on one evening, or over a number of meetings- in particular the middle phases may last over several dates. The average amount of time required from meeting to sex is usually somewhere between 5 and 9 hours- where some of the phases, such as the first, usually last only a few minutes
1. Open
The man approaches the woman and initiates conversation. This phase is successfully negotiated when the woman indicates that she is willing for the man to stay- we call this indication the "hook-point".
2. Female-to-male attraction
The man demonstrates his value to the female, taking care not to appear try-hard. The female responds by giving indicators of interest- light touching, eye contact, smiling etc.
3. Male-to-female attraction
The man baits the female into investing in the interaction through demonstrating her own unique attractiveness- i.e. he gives her a chance to "win him over". The man responds by rewarding the female for her efforts- either verbally, or through light touching etc.
4. Conversation
Having established mutual attraction, the interaction becomes more substantial and a sense of connection and rapport is formed. This phase is the opportunity for the male and female to discover the breadth and depth of topics and experiences which they have in common.
5. Connection
Both parties feel a vibe that it is 'on'. The conversation may decrease in fervour, leading to the development of sexual tension. Kissing usually occurs during this phase.
6. Intimacy
The location for the interaction should now have moved to a more private venue, such as the home. More intimate physical contact may comfortably ensue at this phase.
7. Foreplay
The couple begin the physical escalation towards sex. Premature commencement of this phase- such as in the meeting place venue - may abort the pick-up before the end.
8. Last-minute resistance
This is the point of no return for the female, where she may throw out a number of emotional objections disguised as logical propositions. The man needs to reassure the female at this point of his commitment to her and the interaction.
9. Sexual intercourse
The couple have sex. It may be necessary to do this several times in order to commence a relationship.
Observing a male-female interaction at this level of granularity helps maintain the smoothness of the pick-up artist's escalation, a vital ingredient for the successful communication of respect for a woman's needs in the process from meeting to sex.
Richard La Ruina presents...
How To Pick Up Women In The Supermarket Or Grocery Store
By Richard La Ruina, author of The Natural Art of Seduction
What's with these crazy guys going to noisy, smoky, expensive clubs filled with loads of other guys all trying to hit on the same few hot girls? Don't these people know that we are surrounded with women all day long, everywhere we go? Everyone does food shopping, below are the methods you can use to make your routine grocery purchase turn into trip where you pick up more than your dinner:
1. Be the Fun Sociable Guy
The first thing that needs to be mentioned is your mental state. You can't be "the pickup guy" when you are out shopping, that would be too weird. Your reason for starting conversations with hot women will be that you are a fun sociable guy who talks to lots of people and so talking to her will be natural. Get in this mindset, it's the best one to have for the day-time.
2. Don't Focus on the Result, Focus on the Open
Don't look at every woman and think that you need to get her number, just have the aim to start a conversation and see where it leads. If you are having a nice interaction with a hot woman, taking her number or going for an 'instant date' will be natural.
3. Know the Process
The process for a day-time pickup is different to that of a night time one. An important difference is that you cannot be too sexual, it's out of place and weird. So what do you do? The process is as follows:
1. Be indirect, talk about something situational until she is comfortable and engaged in a 2-way conversation.
2. Find out some personal stuff about her.
3. Get connections.
4. Find a reason to see her again or to hang out.
5. Get the number or go for an instant date (like a coffee).
4. What to Say
Don't worry, I know everyone reading this wants to ask But what do I say? Here are some openers you can use. You can preface each with "You look like you know your stuff":
How can you tell when this is ripe?
How would you cook this?
I have a Vegetarian coming round for dinner so can't cook my famous chicken, what is something I can easily whip up?
Which wine goes with X?
Oh don't buy that salad, this one is way tastier.
Help me choose, pizza or quiche."
So now you can go out and meet women in a much easier and more natural environment where you have no competition. You'll be able to meet nice girls that don't go to clubs, and you won't need to buy anyone drinks. You'll be meeting the real person, without her friends. Good luck!
GMTV Interview between PUA Training's Gambler (Richard La Ruina) and Lorraine Kelly
Gambler was featured as the World's Best Pick-Up Artist on flagship ITV1 breakfast show GMTV. Here he is being interviewed by Lorraine Kelly. Also featured is female trainer - Kezia. For more on Gambler, Kezia, PUATraining check out www.puatraining.com
The interview was about Gambler/Richard La Ruina's new book - The Natural Art of Seduction.
The Four Mistakes Of Pick-Up
By Richard La Ruina, author of The Natural Art of Seduction
Pick-up -- as it really is, rather than as it's taught in the popular magazine -- is a 3-phase sequence which must be followed in order for reliable results. The first phase is attraction, where the man gains attraction from the woman; the second phase is comfort, where the man gets the woman to feel comfortable with him; the third phase is seduction, where the man, having gained attraction and comfort proceeds to convert these vital two ingredients into a sexual relationship. Nearly all the mistakes of pick-up- that is any male-female interaction which does not result in a sexual relationship- can be attributed to an error in following the sequence described here.
Mistake 1: starting at the end
A man who starts at the last phase- seduction- disregards the need for a woman to first feel attracted and also the need for her to feel comfort and initiates the interaction directly in the seduction mode. He touches the woman improperly, conveys too much sexual intent too soon, and will come across as sleazy or worse.
Mistake 2: starting at the middle
Men who have observed mistake number 1 often try to rectify this by implementing a comfort phase before seduction. Almost always they never reach the seduction phase, because having ignored the need for a woman to be attracted, they get stuck in the 'friend zone', where a woman becomes too comfortable with them as a friend to ever feel comfortable proceeding into a sexual relation. Men who start in the middle are commonly referred to as 'nice guys'.
Mistake 3: skipping the middle
Men who are proficient at building attraction (phase one), but then proceed directly to seduction- without comfort- are commonly referred to as "players". A woman may feel attraction to this man, but she is unlikely to believe or understand that he is attracted to her in any way which is unique or relevant to her- a vital and necessary ingredient for the smooth implementation of the seduction phase.
Mistake 4: getting stuck in the middle
Similar to mistake number 2, these men lay down the necessary foundations for seduction, but lack the confidence or the knowhow to advance smoothly into this phase, so forever circle between attraction and comfort. The woman soon becomes confused as to the man's intention and places him, like the nice guy, in the friend zone.
Often, just being aware of the correct sequence of a pick-up can act as a vital checklist during an interaction with a woman. The man should be aware of what phase he is in at any one moment, and never go backwards in the pick-up, nor go forwards too quickly (and skip one of the phases).
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